3

3.

Today I'm having a party. With myself. Cause guess how many months Daniel has been gone?
3!
Three whole months. I know that probably doesn't seem like a lot to most people. 3 months is really short, actually. But there were times where I thought I wouldn't make it past 2 days, let alone 3 months. It's weird to look back and think "there's no way 3 months have gone by already." but it really has! Weird. I'm sure I'll look back in a year and laugh at this, but for now I don't really care.
I'm getting through this.
He's getting through this.

We're getting through this.

Happy 3 months, my dearest Elder Laird! You make my world beautiful.

P.S. Please note: Goggle tan line.

I love summer.

For Dee.

I've said it before.
I'm not a fan of change.

For 10 year's I've been swimming. For 10 years I've looked to coaches for critique, motivation and guidance. For the past 4 year's I've looked to Dee. I've looked to him for advice, fatherly guidance and patience. I've looked to him for more things than swimming. I've looked to him for life.

He's leaving. He's going to BYU. He's taking the assistant coach job, which is amazing.
I'm so unbelievably happy for him. He deserves it. He deserves everything.

I just feel lost now.
We had my whole senior year planned out. We had everything planned out. Where is it now? Gone. With the wind. All the practices I was looking forward to. All the travel meets, the college planning, the progress.
Gone.
Gone with the wind.

it's hard to accept. it's hard for me to process. you'd think I'd be used to people I love leaving by now, though.

He's always been my source of motivation. Of passion.

As I look ahead this next year and a half, I'm scared. I'm scared of the unknown, and the unsteady future before me. I don't know what's going to happen. I don't know where I"m going to go or what I'm going to do.

All I know is that I'm going to do it for Dee. I'm going to be the best, strongest and most persistent swimmer.

I'm going to win. For the man who taught me how.

For Dee.

Happppppy Mothers Day.

Aaahhhhhh.
My appreciation for Mothers day is 10 million times what it used to be now that I have a missionary out.

Sadly we couldn't hear from Joshy because there aren't enough phones in the Brazil MTC to have all the missionaries call.. mom wasn't very happy with that one.

But, I got to hear from my man.

I'm not going to try to explain it to you because there just aren't enough words in the English language to describe how that felt. To hear his voice.. and to hear his laugh. Ahh. Perfection.

It was just like it used to be. Staying up late and talking about everything and nothing at the same time. Getting in those stupid "i love you more" fights that I missed way more than I thought.
Making fun of him when his voice cracked, and him making fun of me when I was a little too sarcastic.
Filling him in on all the drama. Hearing stories about Indiana.

It was amazing. But it made me miss him.

Oh well.. Christmas will come soon enough, right? :/.

Sincerely,
A girl waiting for 21 more months to be with her best friend. Forever.

I'm a poet. and I kinda know it.

Guys, I decided something.

Something that has the potential to be kind of awesome.

Im going to write a book.

Finally.

I have so many notebooks full of ideas, and so many 'beginnings' of books that I didn't have the passion to finish.. but I think I have a good subject now.

Missionaries.





*Resounding applause*

Wooooo!